So Don't You Bring Me Down Today

Wow! So much for that New Year's promise of writing everyday. It's not that I haven't thought about it. I check my own blog on a regular basis like there is something new on there. I've started a post, deleted them, etc. Then I wonder, "Does it even matter, who's reading anyway?" But it does matter. I love writing and putting my thoughts down. And not everything I write has to be witty, clever, sensitive, etc. Isn't a blog just an informal outlet to rant anyway? It's not like I'm writing a great novel!

I've been struggling with my insecurities again. For someone who has prided herself in being confident, I've sure lost it. I don't know when or how that happened, but it did. I expect the worst when people speak to me and have become paranoid that I'm the topic of bad conversation with people around me. Really, that's just being narcissistic. And, if people are talking, why do I care? Because that old saying, "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me," just isn't true. It's a great affirmation, yes. But, words do hurt. You're just a liar if you say it doesn't hurt when someone says something mean or hurtful about you. We all want acceptance. But, at what cost?

So here's what I'm thinking: I don't have a clue how to not let people hurt me. I'm not that wise yet. But I do think a starting place is to surround yourself with people that actually do enjoy your company and generally like you. You can tell who those people are. Invest in the people that are willing to invest in you.

So, I'll leave you with a little inspiration from another Christina that helped me a little tonight! And may it not be as long for my next post!